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As Matt’s proficiency in household routines became ingrained, our focus shifted toward the viability of his future. Recovery at this level required layers of growth, much like building a foundation; construction couldn’t start at the top, nor could it stand without a solid base. Our process mirrored the yearly progression of school subjects like English, math, and history—just as a student cannot advance to higher grades without a foundation, Matt had to solidify the basics before he could handle the heavier demands of self-sufficiency.
Matt’s progress often appeared uneven because the height of various aptitudes varied across different "subjects," yet the structure rose steadily. He still needed guidance to direct the work, but he was becoming an increasingly eager apprentice. We began to integrate intricate life competencies: the meticulous assignment of balancing a checkbook and managing online banking under his father’s guidance, merging his growing handwriting with the logic of financial management.
Building on the resolution of his "ghost life" previously mentioned, we entered the realm of complex legal responsibilities. While the earlier decision to sell his house and car provided a sense of freedom, the arduous process of filing the necessary paperwork and managing the transfers was his first real exposure to handling multi-faceted, long-term obligations since the accident. During the same period, we listed his car for sale, another step toward resolving the logistics of his previous life and an essential building block toward reclaiming his autonomy.
Self-directing his own timeline began with setting his own alarms and even adjusting for daylight saving time. He moved from simply following a schedule to owning it. He also resumed a responsibility he had deeply valued before the injury: stoking and tending the wood-burning fireplace. Seeing him handle the hearth again was one more feather in his cap.
In the summer of 2019, we introduced 'Economics' to his curriculum. Matt began practicing self-checkout at the grocery store, scanning, bagging, handling money, and processing credit card transactions under my watchful eye. A month later, Matt independently completed an online transaction to buy a soccer ball for his dad’s birthday. It represented more than a simple purchase; he was reclaiming his role as a son who could give as well as receive.
By October, we reached a milestone that was as much for my benefit as it was for his. For the first time in over a year, Matt began staying home alone for up to an hour and a half while I ran errands. After having him glued to my hip for so long, this was a liberating breakthrough for me, though I still checked in by phone halfway through. I would leave him with a checklist of activities, or he would spend the time reading. Yet even as I celebrated my newfound freedom, a wave of sadness often followed; it was a sobering reminder that while I could come and go, Matt’s wings were still clipped.
In the new year, the "autopilot" of his daily life was kicking in. Without prompting, Matt began taking responsibility for tasks such as closing the garage door when he was the last person in, adding items to the family shopping list if he noticed we were running low, and taking items to the basement pantry. In addition, he began writing checks to pay his bills under his father’s guidance, merging his growing handwriting with the logic of financial management.
While these major moves required significant guidance, Matt’s growing ease with technology suggested that his capacity for initiative was expanding. In April, he expressed a specific interest in buying a Google Pixel 4, showing a transition from merely using the tools provided to choosing them himself. He still turned to us for direction, but he was beginning to look toward the horizon.
Undoubtedly, there are other signs of emerging brainwave activity subtly creeping forward: some imperceptible, others we’ve missed, overlooked, or forgotten—of that I am confident. I share these few examples not as an exhaustive list, but as glimpses into a much larger restoration. The magnificent, boundless cosmos compressed within the human mind, steadily working to enhance Matt’s healing, is unfathomable and an inspiration to me. Gratefully, the Master Architect—who designed the very logic Matt once mastered—never stops rebuilding.
© 2026, Sarah Watkins
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